Artificial Intelligence in automatic flushers

[manwithnoname]

This might see gross to some out there, but it's a personal experience I find frustrating: Automatic toilet flushers need to have some type of AI attached or worked into its current technology.

I'm sitting, you know, doing my...duty. The toilet decides to flush while I'm still there doing my thing. That's wrong. It's disgusting getting some of that toilet water splashed onto me in varying places. I'm not finished yet, but it somehow it wants to flush.

They have these where I work. I eat a balanced diet, and in an 8 to 10 hour work day, I can't hold it until I get home. I hate using them at work. So many people use them; I consider them pretty much public toilets, that's why I use 2 to 3 of those sanitary toilet seat covers (or gaskets) for protection. I hate it when people don't use the seat covers b/c they leave their oily, hairy imprint on the seat. Sometimes they leave...fecal matter at the very back of the seat; my assumption is they just sat back too far.

I'm not a really over-the-board OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder) type, but I do carry hand sanitzer, small bottle.

[Der Mike]

This might see gross to some out there, but it's a personal experience I find frustrating: Automatic toilet flushers need to have some type of AI attached or worked into its current technology.

I'm sitting, you know, doing my...duty. The toilet decides to flush while I'm still there doing my thing. That's wrong. It's disgusting getting some of that toilet water splashed onto me in varying places. I'm not finished yet, but it somehow it wants to flush.

They have these where I work. I eat a balanced diet, and in an 8 to 10 hour work day, I can't hold it until I get home. I hate using them at work. So many people use them; I consider them pretty much public toilets, that's why I use 2 to 3 of those sanitary toilet seat covers (or gaskets) for protection. I hate it when people don't use the seat covers b/c they leave their oily, hairy imprint on the seat. Sometimes they leave...fecal matter at the very back of the seat; my assumption is they just sat back too far.

I'm not a really over-the-board OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder) type, but I do carry hand sanitzer, small bottle.

I will say that the odds of you getting a disease from a toilet seat is virtually non-existant (cold porcelain is a horrible medium for bacteria or germs to survive).

And if you realize that the only reason the toilet flushed was because the light level on the sensor changed, you can always place something over the censor --- such as toilet paper --- to block it.
-=Mike

[Dr Maturin]

BS. It's psionic, man. Bring your tin foil hat to the toilet.

[manwithnoname]

I will say that the odds of you getting a disease from a toilet seat is virtually non-existant (cold porcelain is a horrible medium for bacteria or germs to survive).-=Mike

That is true, but like I said:

1. Individuals -- too many of them -- leave their feces on the toilet seat (towards the back of). I can not bring myself to sit on someone else's fecal matter.

2. Fact: Work = perspire, with some natural oil secretions along with it. So, walking into a stall, here's what I see: An exact imprint of butt cheek and thighs pasted to the toilet by a person's oily, sweaty secretions and littered by hundreds of their butt and thigh hairs, sometimes with a dab of fecal matter. I think a major contributing factor of this is due to people's obesity or of being too overweight; their overflowing butt and thighs make it hard for accurate placement of body parts, thus their...misfire of substances, left over for my viewing pleasure.

I will try blocking the sensor "eye" with a piece of toilet. Great suggestions, though.

[manwithnoname]

BS. It's psionic, man. Bring your tin foil hat to the toilet.

I've tried that already. People at work keep staring and laughing. Besides, the foil just magnifies UFO messages, which by the way, I've been successful in keeping to a minimum.

Hmmm? Maybe it's the generic brand of foil that's...foiling my attempts.

[Stunning_in_Purple]

Okay, that pun hurt, really. I think I see some of my brain oozing out from my cardboard spacehelmet.

[Karachi Vyce]

Hmmm? Maybe it's the generic brand of foil that's...foiling my attempts.

*car crash*

[manwithnoname]

...you can always place something over the censor --- such as toilet paper --- to block it.
-=Mike

LATE BREAKING NEWS:

Placed piece of toilet paper over sensor before sitting down. It worked.

Life has now been made...infinitely crisis-free (funny dig at DC's major event, issue #6: great read) and tranquil.

[manwithnoname]

Okay, that pun hurt, really. I think I see some of my brain oozing out from my cardboard spacehelmet.

L...O...L!

[Dr Maturin]

What I hate about the auto-flushers is that sometimes they don't work. So you drain your lizard, the sensor doesn't work, you try the manual button and it doesn't work, then somebody enters and you leave a urinal full of piss and they think you're an uncouth simian for not flushing the toilet.

[frulad]

I've found that if your shirt is sufficently dark enough the sensor won't trigger...

[manwithnoname]

...shirt is sufficently dark enough the sensor won't trigger...

Oh, cool. Trent Renzor posts here! Awesome.

[frulad]

Hah! Oddly enough, it's happened with my Big Bad Voodoo Daddy and Jay And Silent Bob Strike Back t-shirts.

[manwithnoname]

Hah! Oddly enough, it's happened with my Big Bad Voodoo Daddy and Jay And Silent Bob Strike Back t-shirts.

Thanks for not taking the joke offensively, Frulad. Just trying to be funny.

Jay and Silent Bob Strikes Back fan, are you? You The Man! I love that the movie. Favorite line from the movie: "Do you know why they call me CockKnocker?" (BOOM <sound>!) In the nuts. LOL. Hilarious.

[frulad]

Big Kevin Smith fan checking in. (And by big I don't mean I'm fat... :P)

Luckily, livin' in NorthEastern PA, making "The Prilgrimage" to Red Bank to check out the locations Smith has used in his films is only a two to two-and-a-half hour drive, which I've done a few times. Was actually hanging outside of the comics shop the day they filmed the one scene for J&SBSB and got to meet the Man, Mewes and Lee when they broke for lunch. Will be headin' to Vulgarthon next month, too...